The term “breadcrumbing” might be new to you, but considering how common it is, you have most likely experienced it before. Dating coach Alison Wellington shared her thoughts on the trend with xoNecole and tips on how to avoid getting caught in the trap.
Coach Wellington defines breadcrumbing as “when someone gives a romantic interest just enough attention to keep them interested but they aren’t really looking to commit.” Essentially, breadcrumbing is leading someone on. This is common amongst narcissistic partners who want you around, just as long as they need you. For example, they’re infatuated by you one day, but only ever reach out for sex. Or maybe you question their lack of consistency and they try to gaslight you. Those are common forms of breadcrumbing.
To avoid experiencing this, state clear boundaries and make sure their behaviors are in alignment. Coach Wellington says: “If you’d like to speak to the person you’re seeing every day or to go out on dates once a week, make this known to your person. After you’ve kindly made your expectations clear, if the person is unwilling or unable to deliver, then move on.”
If you are realizing that you are currently being breadcrumbed, show yourself grace. Failed relationships or flings can stir up internal feelings of failure but don’t let the shame sink in, no matter how hard it tries. There’s always more fish in the dating pool, so have fun exploring until you meet potential partners who complement the life you’re creating, instead of conflict with it.